Regular Season Wrap-Up

So this is NOT a recap of Round 1 of the playoffs. That will be delayed until Monday due to my ongoing battle with my internet connection at home. This is Part 1 of the Regular Season Recap. Part 2 will be the giant mass of stats, awards, and other garbage that I'm planning on releasing just before the Championship Game.

Before we dig in, I have several announcements...

1: Noah was actually victorious in Week 12 against Tyler. I spent a good portion of the recap talking about how each team's Wild Card player scored a ton of points but both players were on the bench... but that was wrong. Early in the season I stopped posting injuries and just took over the task of subbing a WC player for an injured player of the same position. With WR Anthony Carter's points added in, Noah won by just 0.06 points!! Fuckin' crazy.

With the change, the Fukushima Fallouts finished 2-12 and the Blue Barracudas finished 3-13.

2: Don't forget to check out our new Fantasy Football site at tsbshowdown.forumotion.com

The site will host the real FF league, and then move on to Season 2 of Tecmo in January or February.

3: For those of you/us who have/will be eliminated, don't stop following the blog! I'm going to do a Pro Bowl game that coincides with the Championship game. It's a battle between the two Divisions as Fútbol is So Fancy takes on Big Dick Shiancoe. The roster list will be released along with all of the stats sometime next week.

Regular Season Wrap-Up

Part 1: Journey to the Playoffs

What’s up, Fantasy Footballers?? ¿Que pasa, Tecmo Technicians?

There’s an intense amount of stats for me to sift through, and without the internet at home I simply don’t have enough time to release this all in one report. So, to tide you over I thought I would do a write up on each playoff team, focusing on their journey to the playoffs. Enjoy!

Ashley Woods and the Holyhead Harpies

This picture is just too perfect. It’s crazy amounts of cool!
http://www.deviantart.com/download/140877476/HP__Holyhead_Harpies_by_DoodleWEE.jpg

The good vibes started for this team on Draft Day. While I nervously mulled over my own prospects, Josh roamed the NFL stats site, the weight of the first pick hanging over him.

Then there was Ashley. She skimmed the stats website, chatted with Ty via instant message, and, as Stuart Scott would say, was “as cool as the other side of the pillow”.

Aside from a nudge to go with Jerry Rice as her first pick and a solid “DON’T DO THAT” when considering QB Jim Harbaugh, Woods managed to pluck some of the most productive players of the season from teams none of us were thinking about. WR Robert Clark of the Lions and RB Johnny Johnson of the Cardinals are great examples.

The Harpies carried the momentum of a great draft into the regular season, winning their first 4 games by a combined total of over 280 points!! The team was ranked #1 in the league after the first 4 games, but Weeks 5 and 6 would bring trouble. The Harpies suffered their first loss of the season against Drew and Los Cuñados, then followed that up with a nail-biting 5 point loss to David and Osama’s Body Guards in Week 6. At 4-2, Woods was still ranked #2 in the league, but would the losing streak continue??

Nope. The Holyhead Harpies would go on to win their next 8 games and finish with a 12-2 record and the #1 Overall Ranking. Their were some close calls against some surprising teams (Sam and JeBron), but no amount of injuries or bad play could stop them. The season was capped off with a dominant victory over Jon and the #2 ranked Homestar’s Runners, earning Ashley a Bye in Round 1 of the Playoffs.

Major Turning Point: The Week 13 victory of Jon and Homestar’s Runners to lock up the #1 Overall Seed in the Playoffs.

Strengths: The trio of WR’s on this team has produced well beyond expectations. Although the numbers of the Clark Brothers have dropped a bit in the 2nd Half of the season, Jerry Rice made sure to pick up the slack. Finally, Christian Okoye is a one man wrecking crew. His numbers have been absolutely ridiculous, and he can be given full credit for leading the Harpies to several hard-fought victories.

Jon Nelson and Homestar’s Runners

The gang.
http://www.homestarrunner.com/everybody3.jpg

Before the season ever started, one thing was certain between Jon and I... Nothing else in the world was as important as Jon drafting Bo Jackson. As Draft Day rolled around, I remember thinking that it was quite possible that Bo would fall to the #6 spot. I figured Josh would take a QB, I wasn’t certain about Tyler, I knew Jamie was getting Montana if he was available, Noah was a crapshoot, and all I wanted was Warren Moon.

Well, we all know what happened. Tyler went with Barry Sanders, and Noah took a QB. I remember calling Jon and him asking “IS BO STILL AVAILABLE?!?”, immediately followed by a maniacal cackle once he realized that 5 people passed on “The Greatest Tecmo Player in the History of Time”.

9 consecutive wins later, Jon had proven himself right. He thrashed my team twice, and he embarrassed plenty of others. But then, in Week 10, a strange thing happened...

JeBron.

Out of nowhere, the unstoppable force hit an unmovable object, and a great battle ensued. When the smoke cleared, Jon was handed his first loss of the season. He was mortal!

After that game, Jon lost another 3 in a row. Going into the final game of the season he was now tied with Drew at 9-4, although he held a Tie-Break over Los Cuñados after beating the team twice earlier in the season. With his back up against the wall, Jon and Homestar’s Runners returned to their mighty form in the final week, scoring 153 points and capturing the Division Title.

Major Turning Point: It was tough to see this at the time due to an undefeated record, but a Week 6 victory over Drew and Los Cuñados was incredibly important for Homestar’s Runners. If Jon had lost that game, the Tie-Break would not have existed and Drew would have won the Division based on his Points lead. Also, the final win of the season to clinch the Division is obviously very important.

Strengths: Bo Jackson. He was the undeniable leader of his team and the league throughout the 1st Half of the season. Despite a short slump in the 2nd Half, he’s still the powerhouse behind this team. WR Drew Hill also gets some respect, as he generally accounts for the most or 2nd most points on the team. Don’t sleep on QB Jim Everett or the Steelers Defense. They can both surprise you with big games.

Drew Draeger and Los Cuñados

No beard?? WEIRD.
http://www.earwolf.com/wp-content/plugins/user-avatar/user-avatar-pic.php?id=145&w=200&random=1306872713

My journey to the playoffs wasn’t too bad. I was in 2nd place in my Division the entire season, and I never dropped below 3rd place overall after Week 3.

After a big loss to Jon in Week 1, Los Cuñados went on to win 4 consecutive games, including a victory over Ashley and the Holyhead Harpies in Week 5. I held onto 2nd Place overall and in the Division through Week 6, despite another devastating loss to Jon. I would go on to trade Wins and Losses for the next 4 weeks, and at one point I was 6-4 and tied with David and JeBron in the middle of the pack.

Luckily for me, Los Cuñados pulled it together for an exciting run at the Division Title. My team won 4 consecutive games to close out the season, narrowly missing a shot at claiming the Division Title when Jon defeated Sam in his final game. With the #1 Wild Card spot locked up, I’ll host JeBron and Cool Story, Bro in Round 1 of the Playoffs. I’ve beaten JeBron twice, but that does little to boost my confidence.

Major Turning Point: The loss to Jamie in Week 10 was tough because she had been doing poorly up to that point and it dropped me down to 6-4, with a possibility to fall out of playoff contention in the coming weeks. The two biggest wins of my season were over Josh and David in Weeks 13 and 14, as all three of us were scrambling for playoff positioning and I was still in the hunt for a Division Title.

Strengths: Ummmm... the Bears Defense?? I’m not sure, actually. The 1st Half of the season would go to Phil Simms and Thurman Thomas, but both players struggled later in the season. The 2nd Half would go to Marion Butts, who went on a rampage for a few weeks to help me pull off some key victories. The Bears Defense has definitely been a solid for me all year. I’m glad I traded for them!

David Horn and Osama’s Body Guards

They look quite friendly.
http://www.beyondhollywood.com/stillsx/2007/06/al-qaeda-terrorists.jpg

Anyways, I had the pleasure of drafting David’s team, and in my preseason predictions I was certain that he’d finish in the Top 2 or 3 overall. I wasn’t far off, but for awhile it looked as though he was doomed to miss the playoffs.

Osama’s Body Guards started off with a promising win over the Fukushima Fallouts, but went on to lose their next 3 games, including a huge 122 point loss to Ashley and a 51 point loss to Sam. David wasn’t a big fan of this losing streak, so he deciding to do some streaking of a different kind... through the quad, that is.

The OBG’s racked up 4 straight victories as part of a 6-2 mid-season that propelled the team to #4 in the overall standings and #2 in the Division. David had a shot to take over the #1 Wild Card spot with a victory over Drew and Los Cuñados in the final week of the season, but fell short in the end. Still, with the #2 Wild Card Spot locked up, David and the Osama’s Body Guards will host Josh and the Tatooine Sand People in Round 1 of the Playoffs.

Major Turning Point: The victory over Josh and the Tatooine Sand People in Week 5 was crucial because it prevented David from falling victim to a Tie Break after he lost to Josh later in the season. This game also sparked the 6-2 run for the OBG’s, including a victory the very next week over Ashley and the Holyhead Harpies.

Strengths: It’s truly a team effort when it comes to David’s team. Stars rise and fall, such as Jim Kelly’s rise from a dud to a stud in the 2nd Half of the Season. KR Dwight Stone has provided an electric boost of points from an unexpected source, and Kicker Mike Cofer has cashed in on the talented 49ers offense to provide a steady stream of Special Teams points. If Chris Miller can avoid mistakes and his RB’s show up to play, David is a formidable foe.

Josh Hinke and the Tatooine Sand People

I like this alternative, comic book look.
http://starwarsgalaxies.station.sony.com/images/features/friday/9_21_07/nomads-hdr.jpg

What a roller coaster ride. Josh’s season was full of twists and turns, and I honestly had no idea at any point in the season whether or not his team would make the playoffs. There was a lot of entertaining drama around this team due in large part to Troy Aikman (the #1 Draft Selection) having such a poor season, and Cris Carter not registering a single point through the first 9 weeks.

Josh opened the season against Ashley and the Holyhead Harpies in a one-sided battle that he lost by 77 points. The Sand People brushed it off and rebounded nicely with 2 consecutive wins, but little did we know that this was just the start of an up and down pattern. Josh would lose the next 2, win the next 2, lose the next 2, then win the next 2 games to bring his team to 6-5. The games against Sam were particularly close and exciting, and the loss to JeBron was an intense game as well. One thing is certain, Sand People games were heart-stoppers.

After the ups and downs, the Sand People were still in the playoff hunt, but they would need to put together at least 1 more victory, maybe 2, in the final 3 games of the season.

David was first. Josh only trailed him by 1 game in the standings, and had a chance to draw even with a victory. The Cowboys were with him on this day, allowing him to rack up 139 points and a crucial victory. If Josh could beat Drew the next week and Tyler in Week 14 while David lost in Week 13 and beat Drew in Week 14, Josh could vault to the #1 Wild Card Spot!

But Drew and Los Cuñados would not cooperate. The Sand People would go on to defeat Tyler in Week 14 and lock up the #3 Wild Card Spot and another rematch with David in Round 1 of the Playoffs.

Major Turning Point: I’ve got one good and one bad. The “bad” was drafting Troy Aikman #1, although who could have forseen his poor production. If Josh had taken Joe Montana or Dan Marino instead, I think he could have finished 10-4 or 11-3 and contended for the Division Title. In the end, not Josh’s fault.

The good (great, actually) was his Week 11 victory over Jon and Homestar’s Runners. I talked with Josh, and he did NOT see this coming. The Sand People were heavily favored to lose, but they put together one of their best performances of the season to shock a powerhouse and keep their playoff hopes alive.

Strengths: Three things stick out to me: The 49ers Defense, James Brooks, and Jay Schroeder (Honorable Mention: Mark Clayton). San Fran has been stupid good on D, providing huge boosts of points when the rest of the team couldn’t muster much. Brooks has been solid all season, rarely dipping below the 15 point mark and outscoring Emmitt Smith on many occasions. Finally, Schroeder stepped up to the plate as a solid 2nd QB. On a team where Bo Jackson sees the ball 70% of the time, Schroeder was still able to put up solid numbers and help Josh to some key victories.

JeBron Lames and Cool Story, Bro

Awww, what’s wrong little buddy?
http://thesportspin.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/lebron-crying.jpg

Need another friend on Facebook?? Hit up JeBron.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sfrm=1#!/profile.php?id=100002447215599

Wow. This is absurd. I can’t believe I’m writing a recap on JeBron’s team.

It all started when She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named dropped out of the Tecmo league less than 24 hours before the Draft was supposed to occur. “Fuck it”, I said. I’ll make it a ghost team, and we’ll draft as if it’s any other Owner and we’ll just let it ride.

Well, Draft Day rolled around and 60% of the Owners (you know who you are) were unable to participate. I decided to draft my team, Jamie’s team, Jon’s team, and David’s team. I suddenly had no desire to draft the Ghost team, so Ashley was nice enough to pick up the slack. When it came time for the Ghost’s first pick, Ashley paused for a bit... “You know what? I’m going to draft this team based on which name’s I think are the coolest”.

Boom. A legend was born.

From Danny Peebles and Cleveland Gary, to Al Del Greco and Vai Sikahema, Ashley selected the most random bunch of players I’ve ever seen. Later that night as I way typing up the rosters I decided that I didn’t like using “Ghost” as a name. The NBA playoffs were in full swing, and LeBron James was all over the TV being his douchey, dumbass self.

Then it hit me.... I could combine my anger at the Ghost scenario and LeBron in one fell swoop...

AND FROM THE DEPTHS OF THE DARK ABYSS... FROM THE VERY BOWELS OF CTHULHU HIMSELF....

JEBRON LAMES WAS BIRTHED UNTO THIS WORLD.

Hmm, where were we?? Oh, yes. As I went through and ranked the teams in the preseason I obviously put the JeBron as #10, with a chance to win 2-3 games. Well, JeBron slapped me in the face with a win in Week 1, and surprised everyone with a 3-1 start.

“How can this be?!?”, I thought. But misfortune wasn’t far off for Cool Story, Bro. The team would go on to lose its next 3 games and drop to 3-4. “Aha!”, I thought, “Now you show your true colors”... Wrong again!

JeBron fought back with wins over Noah and Jamie, and capped off the 3 game winning streak by delivering Jon and Homestar’s Runners their first loss of the season! Are you serious?! Cool Story, Bro was on top of the world!

But just to mess with us, the team went on to lose their next 3 games. So if you’re keeping score that’s a 3 game losing streak, a 3 game winning streak, and another 3 game losing streak. Wowzers. Just as JeBron was cooling off, Jamie and the Westies were heating up. A playoff battle was brewing.

It all came down to the final week of the regular season, and the odds were on JeBron’s side. Cool Story, Bro needed a victory over Noah (the lowest ranked team), while the Westies needed to defeat Ashley (the highest ranked team). Just to make sure he didn’t back his way into the playoffs, JeBron went out and demolished the Fukushima Fallouts, posting up 140 points and roaring his way into the postseason.

By securing the #4 Wild Card spot, JeBron will face Drew and Los Cuñados for a third time this season. JeBron is 0-2 against Drew so far, but the second game was only decided by 7 points. Anything can happen!

Major Turning Point: Weeks 9 and 10. With a win over the Westies in Week 9, JeBron secured a critical Tie-Break that consistently prevented Jamie from breaking through the playoff bubble. Week 10 was the victory over Jon, which was obviously not expected and went a long way towards finishing at an even .500 for the season.

Strengths: Don Majkowski is easily the biggest contributor to this team. Merril Hoge and Cleveland Gary have produced consistent and sometimes shocking point totals, and the Dolphins Defense definitely has its good moments.

Predictions

I’m not going to say who I think will win each playoff matchup, but I will list what I think the odds are for each team winning the Championship. Keep in mind I’m terrible at this sort of thing and have no previous experience assigning odds to anything.

Holyhead Harpies: 2-1
Homestar’s Runners: 3-1
Los Cuñados: 3-1
Osama’s Body Guards: 4-1
Tatooine Sand People: 6-1
Cool Story, Bro: 10-1